Throwing them a curve ball

Have you ever noticed how some people say something with the explicit purpose of making you ask about it? For example; you could be having a conversation and the person you’re talking to says something like, “I’d normally do that, but I can’t now, considering what’s happened”.

What they want us to ask is “what happened?” To say I hate this conversational tactic would be like saying I’m not a great fan of wirewool pants.!

If you want to discuss an operation you’ve had, then say “I’ve had an operation”. Don’t try and make me ask about it in some surreptitious way; I have as much interest as premium bonds.

I’ve started resorting to giving the answer furthest from what they’re so desperately in need of. So when the conversationally challenged of this world say something like “I can’t believe what happened”, I reply with “I know”.

There is nothing funnier than watching their whole world collapse; NOTHING funnier!

I cannot describe the amusement I get at watching these pontificating pillocks desperately try and get another rectum twitching statement into the conversation. It’s just hilarious….and a little bit pathetic.

Here are some examples:

“I can’t believe that just happened”
Wants – “what’s that?”
Gets – “I know”

“I can’t do that since the incident a year ago”
Wants – “incident? Why, what happened?”
Gets – “ah, fair enough”

“You would too if you we’re in my situation”
Wants – “what situation is that, you mysterious enigma whose every word I hang off?”
Gets – “I couldn’t give 2 spicy shits, you total twat”

You get the idea.

I think I’ve just become a little less tolerant of idiots nowadays, but it’s no surprise when you consider the obvious reason why.

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