It’s my first day back in the office after a bank holiday weekend. Alas, I worked Saturday and Sunday but was able to do so from home. This was great because I got to email and generate reports whilst only wearing pants and maybe a sock. Strangely it’s frowned upon when I do that in the office.
So this morning I am back on a train heading towards London, contemplating a much needed nap. Then, out of nowhere, a young woman gets on and sits practically next to me talking… sorry… TALKING into her phone at great speed, without breaks or punctuation, in a language I don’t recognise.
If you’re going to disturb me and keep me awake at least have the decency to let me have a narrative I can mock you with. Instead all I have is “CHAMBO LAPAMOOPOO DIBIDO BICHEDOOFIBBLE CHOOMA WOPPY BADUMOPA LIPU”
Hmm, pick the bones out of that one Dan….
It’s ok, i can still sleep through this. I CAN sleep through this.
“WABBADONG CHIBLOFANTA MISA BILOP PLOBBLE”
Come on Dan, you can sleep through this…..(eye starts to twitch)
“BAMSA FOOGLIN JIBBY JOBTOSH BIDDYBUDCHIMCHANG”
After a couple more stations of this shit, the door opens and….oh fuck, it’s the dipstick from my previous blog https://headinablender.wordpress.com/2013/05/02/suited-and-unmuted/ who decides to sit right in front of me.
I wonder if stripping to my pants and sock will make them fuck off and let me sleep?
Let’s find out….