Last night I decided to get my hair cut because I was starting to look like 1973.
So I drove to the barber shop, spied a parking space and parked in it. The space was a bit tight (smirk), but I slipped in with ease (even smirkier)
Exciting story so far, right?
I got out of my car and started walking towards the barber shop when I heard a voice behind me.
I whirled around and saw a little old lady sat behind the wheel of one of the cars I just pulled up next to. She smiled at me and repeated whatever indecipherable thing she said.
“Pardon?” I said to her, very politely and Englishly.
She cleared her throat and tried again, “You a good driver! I seen 3 people try and park there and give up. You a good driver!”[sic].
“Thanks!” I replied smugly.
Little did she know I often fuck up parking my unnecessarily long American sedan like a cock. Yet I STILL do better than the local drivers here in Las Vegas.
As they say…in a land of twats, the dick is king.
 Who whirls? I just turned around normally.
 No-one says this.