Weight train

Breathe in…
“Hwrrrr!”
Breathe in…
-groan-
Breathe in…
“Mmm…”
Breathe in…
“Prprprprrrr”
Breathe in…
“Ooh, parrr….”
Breathe in…
“Psshheeeww”
Breathe in…
“Shhhhhhh”
Breathe in…
-massive vocal yawn
Breathe in…
-pig snort noises
Breathe in…
-blows raspberries
Breathe in… !! Cough !!   “Hwaraaaagh!!!!”  

Pause…  

Breathe in… “MmmmMMMmmm”  

And repeat…  

These are the noises coming out of the mouth of the bouncy castle sized man sat across the aisle from me on the train.  

I could be wrong; it could be his blowhole.

image

Lord of the sniff/sith (sorry, bad attempt at a pun)

Another commuter observation…
The guy opposite me is really heavy breathing through his nose. It’s like a heavily nostrilled Darth Vader.

How the guys next to him is sleeping is beyond me…oh, hang on; headphones.

Good call.