Which tube are you headed on?

The tube door shuts and clouts a woman across the head. She stumbles a bit and tries to style it out by acting unbothered.

Mildly amusing

The door opens again and smacks her a second time across the head in the other direction.

She almost drops her phone. Less styling.

Very amusing.

A guy takes this opportunity to jump on the train just as the driver announces we should ‘mind the closing doors’.

The doors close, twatting him across the head.

Downright hilarious.

Even the woman is smirking.

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In touch with himself much?

Ok, check this….the weird OCD guy next to me keeps doing the following…

Touch nose, wipe nose, stroke forearm, touch forehead, twitch shoulder, rub nose, nod head, stroke forearm, touch leg, touch iPhone to forehead (seriously!), touch nose, forehead, nose, forehead, chin.

I shit you not! It’s taken me 30 mins to write this so I could observe and get the right order!

Why do they always sit next to me???????!